I realized there actually isn’t very much to say, other than that banks in China make it very, very difficult for an American to open an account there.
My new employer requires their full-time employees to open accounts at a certain bank, so naturally I went to the branch closest to work with my passport.
I was promptly rejected because I didn’t have the required documents, which were: passport, proof of employment, proof of residence, and a “tax ID” (which turned out to be my social security number).
(Right after this, I was told by the apartment complex that I could not rent without a bank account, so I was stuck for quite a while until housing was resolved).
I tried some other branches and even other banks where I pretended I didn’t speak a lick of Chinese, but got the same answers as soon as they saw my American passport.
After renting a place with a bit of help (see previous entry), I went to the local district office and got a single-use proof of residence solely for opening bank accounts, and was finally able to get an account.
Then things kind of took a 180-degree turn, because they saw the company name on my proof of employment (offer letter), and told me since that my new employer is a huge client of theirs, I am automatically granted the highest account level without having to maintain the minimum balance (RMB 500,000). I also don’t have to pay the bank any commission fees on money transfers, and I never have to wait in line at the bank.
With housing and bank account out of the way, there was just one last thing to do – get my work visa. This turned out to be the single most annoying item to get, with lots of red tape and further complicated by human factors. As of today (September 17th), I still don’t have it but at least I know roughly when I will be able to get it. More on this later.